Dwell on the beauty of life. Watch the stars, and see yourself running with them.
And I do a lot of dwelling, but not about the beauty of life. The opposite, in fact. My default seems to be dwelling on the empty portion of the glass rather than the full portion. I use it to feed my depression (or is it a result of my depression?), which is my comfortable space, my constant companion, and in a sick way I really miss it when it’s not around.
I’m fully aware that this isn’t healthy for me and I need to cultivate behaviours which will push me more towards positive thoughts and actions.
And that’s where I can use the photography. It forces me to look for the beauty in the most mundane things and then capture it on camera. The end result of which is incentive enough to focus on the full portion of the glass, I think.
A gem cannot be polished without friction, nor a man perfected without trials.
Status: fucking tired. Wide awake at 3:30am and couldn’t get back to sleep, so gave up trying around 4am and got up. Night terrors as usual, but these extended throughout the night which is unusual. Things peaking out from shadowy corners, movement across the room and from behind the drapes. My mind was obviously overactive last night seeing things which are not there.
Received odd feedback yesterday from an interview which I had two and half months ago. I’d long forgotten about it, rightly getting the impression during the interview that they weren’t really interested, which is fine. That said, the tardiness of the response and inelegant content of the message was a little off-putting and has left me wondering if I should seek clarification or leave it alone. Perhaps that’s all I need to know about the organisation, tactless correspondence as an indicator of the way they approach employee relations.
Still, is this an opportunity to make some changes?