Status: Good. Ok. Cold lingering, but zen and chill.

I’m not convinced that the meditation is actually helping me anymore. I’m basically drifting for 5 minutes while I go through the guided meditation app, and I think that defeats the purpose. It’s supposed to help me focus, or at least I’m supposed to be focusing on specific things while going through the process and that’s meant to strengthen my ability to be present in the moment during the day. But, not so much. Have I seen some improvement? Yes. So, two choices: set it to the side or lean into it and take the next step. Suspect that I’ll do the latter.

Decided to get back onto the dating apps after a 6 month absence. Realise that it is not the optimal time of year for this, but it felt right and I was ready. Connected with one lady and we quickly agreed to meet for a coffee and chat last night. In the course of finalising plans, she didn’t like the venue I had suggested so she proceeded to be antagonistic and rude. Trying to draw me into conflict. I thought I handled it quite well; I didn’t take the bait, I stayed polite and chill in the face of some really rude texts, and then wished her all the best and luck with her search. A parting barb of invective from her to which I did not respond.

Maybe the meditation is helping after all.

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